It can be difficult to support families to diagnose and treat students with ADHD that may be negatively affecting them in the school and classroom environment.
As an elementary teacher and an individual with ADHD, I have first hand experience with my own ADHD journey as well as my own child’s ADHD diagnosis and treatment. This has helped me successfully work with families of students in my classroom over the years to seek out a diagnosis and treatment for ADHD. I am happy to share tips so that you can also help your students and families.
Challenges of Talking About Students with ADHD
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Talking with parents about their student’s struggles can be a challenge for teachers and getting some parents to open up about their child’s lack of focus can be like walking on eggshells. A few of the reasons for the challenges in talking with a family about seeking out an ADHD diagnosis includes the medical aspect of the discussion, the negative focus of the child’s behaviors, and the inconsistent self-awareness of some of the challenges that may come with ADHD.
Medical Diagnosis for students with ADHD
Sometimes teachers mix up the statement that only a qualified medical professional can diagnose ADHD and misinterpret that as teachers can’t have opinions about students possibly having ADHD.
In truth teachers need to respect the experience and authority that they bring to the table as teachers. Day in and day out we are professionals in working with children in a specific age group. As we gain experience over the years as teachers we can tell what is more typical in a child’s development and the areas in which we may notice some concerns.
Don’t mistake not being able to make the formal diagnosis of ADHD with not having an opinion of or concerns about a possibility of ADHD.
Negative Focus on students with ADHD
Parents of students with (possible) ADHD probably have heard a lot of negative talk over the years. If you think about the common symptoms of ADHD, forgetfulness, careless mistakes, doesn’t seem to listen or follow through on directions, difficulty organizing tasks, easily distracted, talks excessively, interrupts other and struggles with patience; symptoms that are all in direct contrast to characteristics of behaviors that promote learning at school. These challenges have most likely been pointed out quite a bit over the years.
At some point parents may begin to feel like the school just sees the negative in their kid, especially if the parents are not on the same page or in agreement about the severity of the school’s concerns for the child.
People with ADHD Struggle With Self-Awareness
If there is a concern that a child has ADHD, the parent may also struggle with some of the same things as their child. While this might lead to a minimizing attitude on behalf of the parent, ‘I was the same way when I was a kid and I turned out fine,’ as teachers it is important to keep in mind who your audience is if you are trying to convince them to get their child diagnosed with ADHD.
People with ADHD typically struggle with self-awareness. This can come in many forms, struggling emotionally with self-regulation, struggling with listening to the next steps (and following through) in reaching out for help as well as struggling to reliably report their own symptoms. You are dealing with a population of people who might not be the best self-reporters of their own (or their child’s) situation as a whole. The parents might not be aware of how much the symptoms of ADHD could be impacting their own lives.
I am not saying that you should point this out to the parents, but I want you to keep in mind that the home life might be quite different that you would expect. What is a big deal or a concern to you might be nothing compared to the absolute chaos that might be lurking at home.
This is why building a relationship and getting to know the student’s family is a great first step in working toward diagnosing and treating ADHD.
Steps to Work Toward a Possible Diagnosis for Students with ADHD
Communicate Positives
When building a relationship with the family, focus on communication that highlights the positives as well as the challenges. Connect with the family to show that you understand their kid as a learner, that you get who their kid is as an individual.
Focus on Safety and Social Challenges
When communicating any concerns, highlight the safety aspect of any challenges you are having. Parents may have a different opinion on how distracting their child is in the classroom, but hopefully there is a universal agreement that everyone wants their child to be safe.
Most parents want their kids to have friends. At the very least they want them to have social skills. If a student struggles with maintaining friendships in the classroom, you might find parents are more willing to problem solve possible options.
Make Time To Meet
Over the years I have had many successful heart to heart conversations with parents in which I express my concerns about their child’s lack of focus. One of the reasons these conversations are so successful is that I make time to meet in person, scheduling a day and time that works for the parents.
I prefer to find a time after school so that I can allow the parents as much time as possible to warm the parents up and discuss. I find that having these types of meetings typically takes 45 minutes to an hour. This is not a conversation you want to rush.
If parents can only meet before school, I try to schedule a time to meet with the parents that allows me at least 45 minutes before school starts. Before school times are more challenging because you have an immediate stop time, with the kids entering the building.
While this is nice for regular conferences or meetings that you don’t really want to go on and on, the whole point of this type of meeting is to help the parents to take action to get a possible diagnosis or treatment for ADHD.
Need to meet during the school day? Don’t be shy, ask your principal for time out of the classroom during the day. Give them a few days notice and ask if they can find a sub to cover your classroom. While some principals might scoff at this suggestion, a reasonable administrator might try to help you out.
When Meeting with Parents, Invite Backup for Support
Depending on your relationship with the student’s parents you might want to invite an additional person to the meeting. This person could be the social worker, your principal or a special education or RtI teacher. It is better if the individual knows the students, but not a requirement.
Bonus points if this person or a family member of theirs has ADHD. This is a great way to bring up things that might initially feel limiting. I am comfortable sharing with my student’s families that I have ADHD. Sharing this detail makes the rest of the ADHD conversation easier to have because I can relate. Stating things like, “As a person with ADHD myself, I struggle with __________. Have you noticed your child struggles with that?”
Do not invite a huge team of people. The point of this meeting is to have a heart to heart with the family, not make them nervous. In my experience parents will open up and share more information if it is just you and possibly one other person. Once you have more than three other people, the parent might not share as much openly.
* You know your student’s families best, meet with families if you feel it might help. Do not meet with anyone who you think may become combative.
Make a Clear Follow Up Plan
If the parents are open to looking into a possible diagnosis of ADHD for their child, help them through the process. Seeking out a diagnosis can be tricky and some parents might not know what to do if the teacher tells them to talk with their child’s pediatrician.
Any time a parent shows interest in seeking out a diagnosis I tell them they should start with their child’s pediatrician and say the words:
“My child’s teacher is concerned about _______ and thinks we might want to consider an ADHD evaluation.”
I also remind parents that they can seek out a neuropsychological evaluation if they would like a deeper look at how well their brain is working.
Insurance Makes a Difference for Students with ADHD- PPO and HMO for ADHD
As an educator in the U.S., please consider the type of insurance the family is dealing with. If a parent shares that they would like to follow up about an evaluation or treatment, I will ask what type of insurance they have for their child HMO or PPO?
HMO Insurance for Students with ADHD
HMO is typically more limiting compared to a PPO. If the parent ever shares that they have HMO, they should deal directly with their pediatrician at the start. The pediatrician should be the facilitator of the referrals for any evaluation. Unfortunately, in my experience, HMOs lead to extremely long wait times. Families might wait months for an appointment with a child psychiatrist or an outside neuropsych.
Child psychiatrists who accept HMO insurance is also a challenge. A few of the reasons for these challenges are the increased liability when treating children with medication.
You might notice that psychiatrists say they will treat patients age 16 and older, or 12 and older, or 10 and older etc. The younger the patient the more challenging it is to find a psychiatrist willing to prescribe medications. Since HMO insurance doesn’t have a large pool of practitioner choices, parents might find that they only have one child psychiatrist willing to take HMO insurance. Hopefully they are a good fit for the family.
The other challenge for both HMO and PPO insurance is that the medication itself might not be FDA approved for children below a specific age. You can read more about testing the effects of medication in younger kids here.
PPO Insurance for Students with ADHD
PPO insurance is more expensive, but comes with increased flexibility and options (typically). The family has more treatment options and while they may still have to wait, they can call around and compare services and wait times.
I will often suggest some psychologists and psychiatrists that I have worked successfully with for my own family’s needs. I find that giving a parent the phone number and name of a person to contact leads to increased follow through as opposed to talking to your pediatrician.
Follow Up Immediately With An Email
I will write an email immediately following the meeting with the next steps that we discussed at the meeting. This is a nice visual way to remind the parents what we talked about and the names and words to use to contact people for follow up. (If the parent possibly has ADHD as well, they most likely struggle with working memory and may be more forgetful- a common ADHD trait)
Writing an email is a good follow through and creates a to do list for the families. Many times parents of a student you suspect has ADHD, may have ADHD themselves, and can use this additional support.
Medication Is Not The Only Treatment For Students withADHD
Studies show that medication is the most effective treatment for ADHD. As Russell Barkley, a Ph.D. and overall recognized ADHD Guru shares simply, “Medication Works.”
With that said, medication is not the only form of treatment for ADHD and working with families only to get their child on medication is going to be a losing battle.
There are a variety of reasons that parents might be hesitant to medicate their child. The more you connect with them the more they might open up about their medication reservations.
There are a variety of other ways to support students and families with ADHD including behavioral therapy, eating a healthy diet, vitamins and supplements, ,mindfulness, and movement breaks.
If you would like to learn more about ADHD, check out the book Driven to Distraction by Edward Hallowell and John Rattey. This book is a great reference for teachers and families to get an idea of what ADHD is like, how to best treat it and considerations for all things ADHD. I have read most of their books and find them interesting and an enjoyable read because they know their audience so well.
Interested in reading more about student behaviors?
Check out these posts-
- Teaching Students With Difficult Behaviors In The Classroom
- Dealing With Difficult Student Behaviors During Morning Meetings
- Recess is an Amazing Investment in Your Limited Teaching Time
- Teacher Tips for Successful Parent Teacher Conferences
- Teaching Students with OCD in the Classroom
- Report Card Comments for Struggling Students
- A Teacher’s Guide for Students Returning to School After Psychiatric Hospitalization and a Mental Health Crisis
Your Thoughts
Talking with parents about their student’s struggles can be a challenge for teachers. Hopefully these tips will help you navigate those tricky conversations. Have you ever talked with families about a possible ADHD diagnosis? How did it go?
